The Dragon's Treasure — finding your goals.

You need a goal, a lens through which you can see the world. In a podcast, Jordan Peterson, a well-known clinical psychologist, says that aimlessness, lacking a goal, is the same as anxiety. It's not that you have no direction. It's that you have too many directions. It's like being dropped in a maze with a crazy amount of possible paths; you have too many choices, and that triggers anxiety.

Take the TV series 'Breaking Bad' as an example. Walter White, initially a mild-mannered chemistry teacher, lives a seemingly directionless and boring life. A life he doesn't seem happy with at all. After a terminal cancer diagnosis, he experiences anxiety, not only about his health but about the financial well-being of his family after he’s gone. Faced with too many paths and decisions—should he tell his family? Go through traditional medical treatments?—he is drowning in aimlessness.

It's only when Walter White sets a clear goal—to secure his family's financial future by manufacturing and selling drugs —that his course becomes defined. This goal gives the purpose of his actions. Although fraught with peril and ethical compromises, it eliminates the aimlessness that initially plagued him. Suddenly, every decision, every action, every moment is geared toward achieving this one goal. The goal, in essence, pulls him out of the dull and aimless life he had been living up until now, placing him on a specific path that channels his focus and reduces his anxiety.

 

By setting this goal, Walter White invites purpose and complexity into his life. No longer aimless, he gains a sense of direction but also opens himself up to a dangerous path that comes with pursuing this particular 'dragon.' Yet it's clear that having a goal—no matter how morally or ethically complicated—changes how he navigates the world around him. While he might not be the most ethical example, the insane change in Walter White shows what a person is capable of as soon as he finds his goal.

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What are goals?

But what do we mean by goals? For me, goals are a way to filter choices, and that is it. I don't care about the format of a goal or what the goal actually is as long as it helps me focus and filter out the choices in front of me. For example, in a family setting where we all need to choose to go somewhere, I will set a goal: to figure out where we go with the least resistance. And use that goal to filter all the options. Look how I say here 'with the least resistance'; this is crucial because, without that condition, the goal would be 'to figure out where we want to go.' with only that goal, all choices are the same; each option leads to that goal, and thus it keeps out aimlessness. The 'least resistance' helps me filter out all the choices with too much resistance: my younger brother would suggest going to an attraction park, which would be difficult, and the other family members don't want to go there.

Goals need to be practical. Otherwise, they are useless. And their practicality lies in their ability to filter choices. In turn, this will prevent us from feeling overwhelmed, getting lost, and feeling anxious. Then, they also need to provide focus. To create a well, you need to dig for water. Now, you can dig 100 places and still not find any water because the water is located deeper; you have to focus and dig a few deep holes to find water instead of digging 100 small holes.

 

Goals are alive

Goals are not static sentences that you need to place on your website or write down to stare at every day. Goals are as alive as you are; goals provide direction in our lives and help us navigate it. That doesn't mean that your goal needs to be static and get rusty. Goals need to be flexible and bend the phases and changes of the world around us.

For instance, consider the journey of Instagram co-founder Kevin Systrom. Initially, his goal was to build a location-based app called Burbn. However, realizing the overcomplexity and rising popularity of photo-sharing, he pivoted and refined his goal, eventually giving birth to Instagram.

Of course, you could try to be a billion-dollar entrepreneur who sticks to the same goal for their entire journey. Yes, you could, but for the most successful people, their goals often changed and evolved over time. Jeff Bezos first wanted to sell the most books before he expanded Amazon to a much larger company that offers more services than I have fingers and toes on my feet. Elon Musk didn't just aim to make the car brand Tesla successful but kept thinking and setting goals in other areas of life, like space, AI, and social media.

So treat your goal like it is alive. Feed it some new ideas occasionally, change it, and challenge it with recent events and ideas. A goal that is really solidified will withstand everything you throw at it.

You don't need to change to change. It's better not to change it just because you feel like it. If a goal doesn't resonate with you, it shouldn't be kept alive for too long.

 

Becoming practical

So, what does it mean for goals to be practical? Goals need 3 basic qualities: 1. The goal needs to mean something to you. 2. The goal needs to filter choices. 3. The goal needs to drive you to action.

If a goal lacks any of those qualities, then it is not practical. Period.

First, the goal needs to mean something to you. If you are setting a goal that doesn't mean something to you, you won't succeed in achieving it. And you would likely feel miserable even if you do reach the goal. A well-known example is when people become doctors just because their parents expected them to do so. Most fail because they don't have the internal drive to achieve the goal, and the ones who succeed will be unhappy with succeeding in the goal.

Second, the goal needs to filter choices, as we discussed earlier. If you want to make a career choice, but your goal includes hundreds of different paths and careers, then your goal is pointless. A great example is people who want to become rich. You can later become rich in almost any industry, in any profession, under millions of different conditions. But does that actually help you? No, not really.

Third, the goal needs to drive you to action. It sounds so simple, like why else would you set a goal?! Still, it happens more than I can count that I encounter someone who wants to change their life, like switching studies or career, but doesn't do it. They set a goal to filter down their choices but don't choose. This could be due to point 1, the goal doesn't mean anything to you, or because you are afraid. Maybe you are scared for a good reason. If that is the case, make the goal smaller and achievable so you can work towards the bigger goal. Instead of switching careers, you could make it your goal to learn a few new skills; if learning new skills is too much, then make it your goal to investigate a potential new career. Take a goal that drives you to action; when it doesn't force you to act, then you must either change the goal entirely or make a smaller goal.

 

Know yourself

With big goals, it's vital that you know yourself. Like the great Chinese general Sun Tzu said in the book 'The Art of War': 'If you know the enemy and yourself, you need not fear a hundred battles.' Knowing yourself is critical when specifying and adding conditions to your goals.

Understanding your limitations is equally crucial. Consider the story of Michael Jordan, arguably the greatest basketball player of all time. Despite his unparalleled skills in basketball, his venture into his original passion for baseball didn't yield the same level of success. He was in love with baseball, but he knew himself and went into basketball instead.

Moreover, implementing a degree of self-reflection can be instrumental in pinpointing what truly matters to you. Regularly questioning your motivations, aspirations, and the impact you want to have can unveil deeper insights, enabling you to set goals that matter more to you.

 

Types of goals

For me, there are three types of goals: Micro, Action (or short-term), and Long-term goals. Micro goals guide our immediate responses and day-to-day actions. Action goals, structured around specific results, shape our plans and strategies for the coming weeks to months. Lastly, long-term goals are the overarching aspirations that span decades, steering the course of our lives and granting purpose to our existence.

 

1. Micro Goals:

In scenarios necessitating prompt decisions, such as unexpected encounters or surprise conversations, micro goals become pivotal. For instance, when you unexpectedly run into someone you've always admired, you're required to quickly crystallize your goals for you to filter your choices and come to action.

 

2. Action Goals:

Then, we have action goals; these have a relatively limited timeframe, such as completing a project or learning a new skill within a month. These goals require more planning and structured thinking, allowing you to strategize your actions within the defined time frame to achieve the intended outcome. Often, action goals are sub-goals of long-term goals, but they can also stand alone.

 

3. Long-Term Goals:

Long-term goals reside on the extreme end of importance. These are the goals with extensive time lines, potentially spanning years or even a lifetime, like building a successful.

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This article is an extract of the book: Dragon Fire Method. Want to know more? Join the waitlist of the book Dragon Fire Method.